by Dr. Ken Canfield

Don’t worry. This isn’t about politics. It’s about being a father.

The election is over and we’re all left to deal with it, whether we’re happy, a little angry, or mostly indifferent about the results. Maybe our lives will be significantly different in the coming years, or maybe they won’t. We all have hopes and desires, values and opinions that influence how we feel about these events.

Wherever we may land on the issues, we’re dads and life goes on.

As Jon Stewart said this week, “We have to … continue to work day in and day out to create the better society—for our children, for this world, for this country—that we know is possible.” That’s hard to argue with no matter what your politics are.

As dads, we keep loving our kids, providing for them, being consistent role models for them, and raising them into good citizens. Hopefully the past few months haven’t been a departure from that. (It might seem strange to even think of an election having that kind of effect on our behavior, but in today’s world with so much division and disagreement, it’s something to consider.)

However the election and other world events affect you, here’s your friendly reminder:

When the world seems volatile and unpredictable, your kids depend on you for stability.

As one dad said, “My father was like the Rock of Gibraltar in our family. He was a poised landmark we could all count on.”

In an ever-changing world, our children need reliable reference points. They are natural explorers as they grow and mature and figure out the world. Like any explorer, they start with what they know: a fixed point of reference that provides perspective on everything else. They know where that reference point is, and other things can be mapped out in relation to that.

This is why consistency is a key fundamental of the fathering role.

If you are not consistent, it’s like your children are left to navigate the world without a dependable reference point, and they’re much more likely that they’ll struggle to find their way in a big and sometimes frightening world.

Your children need to know what to expect and where they can find you, and this applies to your moods and emotions, your behavior, your faith and morality, your presence in the family, your schedule … pretty much everything. When they have questions, challenges or uncertainties, they need to know that you’re there for them and they need to have a good idea where you stand.

A consistent father is a reference point that provides security, direction, and confidence in a child’s life. And those are especially important during the inevitable storms and times of instability. They’re looking to us, dads. And whether or not things seem to be going smoothly around us, let’s be those reliable sources of calmness and confidence for them.

Let me leave you with one specific way to set a great example for your kids: be a neighbor to those around you, even when they have views and life experiences that are much different from yours. Remember, someday that person with the different views could be your child, so give them all kinds of evidence that you’re going to love and accept them anyway, even when you disagree about some important things.

How have you helped your kids understand the election process and how to keep it in perspective? Share a thought or two on our Facebook page here.