School is important. Fathers need to emphasize that.
Making school a priority is a lesson learned early. The first day of school is a big deal. Playing hooky is not an option. Even being in class when the bell rings shows proper respect for teachers and the educational process. Dads need to encourage our children to take assignments seriously and show pride in their work—from papier-mâché volcanoes to doctoral dissertations. Every hour of the school day should be valued and maximized.
But one of the best educational choices I ever made was taking my son Isaac out of school for six one-hour sessions in a batting cage with a professional hitting instructor.
Here’s how that unlikely scenario unfolded. With one exception, all four of my sons participated in high school football, wrestling and baseball, earning a total of 21 varsity letters. It was never a mandate from dad. But I did have the privilege of watching their participation in sports provide all four boys with lifelong friends, personal rewards, life lessons, and leadership skills.
The last season of the last sport for my last son would be Isaac’s varsity baseball season. Isaac’s wrestling career had been a success, but his final day on the mat was a heartbreaker. At regionals, he had to battle a bracket stacked against him, a few calls that didn’t go his way, and a clock that ran out too soon. Suddenly his season was over two weeks earlier than we had hoped.
One of my most cherished photos was taken from across the gymnasium and captures former wrestlers Alec, Randy and Max sitting beside their little brother on the bleachers just minutes after that final loss. After literally hundreds of matches, the Payleitner boys were done with wrestling.
In Illinois, the high school sports seasons overlap a bit and so baseball was just around the corner. As a winter-sport athlete, Isaac was already behind many of his teammates who had been strengthening their throwing arms and perfecting their swing for months. Plus, the previous year Isaac had not cracked the starting lineup and was used primarily as a pinch runner. So his place on the team was up in the air.
After wrestling he was in great shape, but hitting a baseball takes more than just physical strength. So his dad made a suggestion. I knew he had already been accepted into the University of Illinois and that his class load for his final semester of high school was fairly light. So, I suggested he ditch a few hours of school—with his parents’ permission—to sharpen his batting stance and swing for the fast-approaching season.
To make a long story short, during his senior season Isaac played every inning of every game in center field. He was among the team leaders in hits and RBIs and had more doubles than any other player in the county. In one double header, he had a grand slam and 10 RBIs. And he made the all-conference and all-area teams.
The lessons are many.
Good wrestlers can make great ball players. Under the right circumstance, focused workouts with a professional instructor are worth the investment. Dads should look for opportunities to partner with their sons at their points of need. And of course, it was the disappointing end to one endeavor that helped springboard him into an award-winning experience later. Sometimes rain clouds do have a silver lining.
But the biggest lesson—one that’s hard to convey to a child—is that Isaac earned the right to take off a few hours of classes. He had worked hard in the classroom for 12½ years and had proven himself to his parents and college admissions officers. Young people have a difficult time seeing how hard work today pays off in the future. That’s where a dad who has built a relationship of trust with this son can come alongside him and say, “Finish your studies. Don’t goof off in school. Put in a little extra effort now and it’ll pay off in the long run.”
TAKE AWAY:
School is critically important. But the whole point of school is to set your child up for success later in life. Whether that’s in a boardroom, at a hospital, in a laboratory, in a courtroom, or on a construction site. Or even on a baseball diamond his senior year of high school.
“Education is not filling a bucket, but lighting a fire.”
William Butler Yeats (1865 – 1939)
Read more from Jay at fathers.com here.
Jay Payleitner is a popular speaker for men’s events and the bestselling author of 52 Things Kids Need from a Dad, 52 Things Wives Need from Their Husbands, What If God Wrote Your Bucket List? and dozens of other books. Jay and his high school sweetheart, Rita, live in St. Charles, Illinois where they raised five awesome kids, loved on ten foster babies, and are cherishing grandparenthood. Find out more about Jay — including a free download to help design your own men’s weekend — at jaypayleitner.com.
This blog is an excerpt, in part, from the book 52 Things Sons Need from Their Dads.
