In a world that is sexually spinning out of control, what can we do to protect and support our daughters in this caustic environment? 

Now, we know that girls are wired uniquely different than boys. Where boys may be lured in more by the visual temptation, it’s the relationship—the intimacy—that attracts the girls. They are drawn by the imagination, the attention, the affection and romance. Women are often the ones reading the romance novels, and watching romantic movies, because that emotion and intimacy—even if it’s staged—appeals to them.

So, the best thing we can do as dads is affirm and support their desire for intimacy—in non-sexual ways, of course. We must pursue our daughters’ hearts. Not only are we strengthening the father-daughter bond, but we’re encouraging them to value sex in an important and healthy perspective—and not confuse it with love. 

I’ve seen so many men who want to relate to their daughters, but it doesn’t feel natural to show emotion, and so they withdraw or become critical and look for faults. 

Counseling centers across the country are filled with adult women who condemn their fathers for never showing affection or being emotionally attuned. And it’s common for these same women to have a string of dissatisfying—or completely untrusting—relationships with men. 

The seeds of those attitudes toward men—and toward sex—are forming right now. You need to build a relationship with her and fill her emotional cup with attention and words of affection. If you don’t, she could get the message that you don’t care, or there’s something wrong with her. To try to prove herself, she may go to any lengths, including an unhealthy relationship with boys or men who are unprepared to give her the real intimacy and commitment that she deserves.

Nurture her character. Acknowledge her value as a bright, beautiful young woman with a promising future supported by her earthly and heavenly father.